Sunday, March 1, 2009


Well, if you are a control freak like me, the ultimate test of patience is definitely dealing with a disease like diabetes. Just when you think you have it figured don't.

I think the one thing that makes diabetes different from many other chronic diseases is that there is no way to predict what might happen, there is no constant except that something is going to change. I have yet to be able to predict a blood sugar level, correctly dose carbs or figure out what night time number trends will do. I record meticulously, measure meticulously, plot and ponder numbers and still nothing I do seems to be right.

All day long I spend either checking blood sugars, giving insulin or wondering what his little body is up to. He is 400 one check, 68 2 hours later, even though I measured, counted and dosed accurately (at least so I think). makes me want to scream.

I think all parents of sick kids struggle with feelings of guilt...diabetes is no different. The strict schedules and constant obsessing over numbers is stressful and added with the lack of sleep most nights can wear a person down. Top all of this off with the constant reminder that, even though it will get easier because it becomes more of a habit, it will never may get worse and it will definitely change over time into something new with puberty, illnesses, growth spurts, defiance and stress. There may be associated autoimmune conditions that pop up which is common in type 1 diabetics, there will be complications as the years progress and all of these things will be dealt with in the due time. As a parent, you know there is no reason to stress over what the future may hold...but that is alot easier said than done. There is plenty of stress over the present to deal with.

If there is one known fact that can be gleaned from this new experience it is that diabetes is never boring, and even though Elijah breaks my heart several times a day with his pitiful sobbing, my heart is lifted when I think about what a blessing he is to so many people.

Thank you Lord for my brave litte son and for all of my beautiful, special children.


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